“Can you make that loading screen stay longer?”

Or in other words: When everything that can be wrong with a client is wrong! – The client had already made a couple requests that seemed odd or made no sense in my eyes, but this one really sums up the nature of this client in one word.
I’m currently working on a Phonegap App and the client’s latest request was to add a loading-screen to the app(not for initial loading), so we added a loading-screen.
We didn’t think that one was necessary, but okay…the client wants a loading screen, so he gets one. Don’t get me wrong here, it’s not a splash-screen, it’s really just a loading-screen: a white screen, that says “loading…”
But it didn’t stop there: When he saw the thing implemented his reaction was like: “It dislays for less than a second, that makes the loading-screen seem kind of pointless. Can you make it stay longer?”

Long story short: This is probably the most senseless piece of code I have ever written and most likely will ever have written:

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